So it's a new year on the calendar, but I feel no difference in my house. I keep asking everyone who ever parented a teenager if the attitude Kel is giving is normal or does she just hate me for me.
I know I'm not the best parent, but I do love my kids and want what is best for them. Kelly's attitude is killing me slowly. Cameron is well on his way with his mouth. Personally, I don't remember being this sassy toward my parents, but, when I mentioned this to my mom you could hear the crickets in the distance. So I'm assuming my memory has failed me yet again. I do remember running away and staying with friends, strangers, and even moving out of state for a summer so I could not have been the perfect child as I recall.
Kelly moved out at 14 due to many factors including our inability to get along. I wonder daily if things would have been different had she stayed at home with me. Yes, I know that was not possible due to situations beyond my control.
I've been reading alot of articles on the internet about parenting a teen effectively. Emotion needs to be left out of the equation. I know that I tend to go off the edge emotionally very quickly and that does not make for effective parenting. An article I read today recommended making a list of expectations..some negotiable and some not. Then sitting down with the teen and going over them, negotiating on some and letting her know what the consequences will be. I did something similar to this when Kel moved up here, but the darn computer crashed and it was lost before I could print it. She has not followed it real well. She has not been doing her schoolwork and missed curfew a few times. I can handle the curfew but how do I handle the mouth and the lack of school? She is well behind where she should be in school. She throws the threat of public school back in our face...just send me. I can't send her until she is caught up and I know that she will oversleep and whine that she is sick and miss school alot like she did in Florida. Believe me, I am onto that girl. I have decided that she is going to start virtual classes on January 26th which is the beginning of the new semester. I devised a calendar to get her schoolwork caught up. Now I just need to hold her to it.
Has every child rolled their eyes at their mother whenever she spoke? She does not even realize that she does it. It has become a part of her natural reaction to me. I am well aware that I am the cause of my kids attitudes. I am a sarcastic person by nature and that does not bode well when expecting respect from your kids. They are just like me and I hate it. One of my resolutions is to be less sarcastic. Also, I need to step away and evaluate before I say anything. A Mommy time out is going to be at the top of my list of parenting skills. Unfortunately, I have a hard time calming down and the time out just gives me time to get madder and devise harsher punishments. I know that this is not an effective use of time out. I need to work on that too!
I pray to God daily to help me be a better mother and wife to my family. Sometimes I pray several times a day. To all who read this, please add me to your prayers. I need all the help I can get.
Happy New Year to all my friends and family. I love each and every one of you.
P.S. This cold Glenn and I got is getting a little better, but our voices are quite raw and we try not to talk on the phone or even to each other more than necessary. I will call you all when I am better next week. I'm off to bed so I can get up in a few hours to get Cam on the computer for school.
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